Thursday 29 November 2007

... why we SHOULD buy pirated VCDs ...

JUST FOR LAUGH!

1. Free black plastic bag

You can't get those cool black coloured bags anywhere.The ones sold outside are too big and they are meantfor the tong sampah.

2. Family bond

Every weekend, when you go to wangsa maju JJ, you can see little kids running to the VCD shop to select their favourite Pokemon cartoon VCD. And then mommy will come along to find her favourite Teresa Teng VCD. Next comes big sister to select her F4 VCD. And lastly, big Bro and daddy searching for the latest movies ... and try to eye for some you-know-what VCD. Anyway, the whole idea is, the pirated VCD shop is like a place for weekend family reunion. When was the last time you saw daddy buying little Billy a VCD in Speedy Video ?

3. Cinema sucks

When you reach the cinema, you'll have to line up for 15 minutes before it's your turn to get the ticket. By then, they tell you ticket sudah habis. So you buy tickets for the next show and have to wait another 3 hours. When the time comes, the ticket usher stops you from bringing nasi lemak and cha-kuay-teow into the hall. So you're forced to line up another 10 minutes in the snack bar. By then, you're already late for the show. Lampu sudah tutup when you go in. Oooppss.. terjatuh and veryone laughs at you.Next, the cinema bores you with 15 minutes of iklan. Frankly speaking, I dunno why the government ban 'triple x' VCDs when all the beer commercials in the cinema feature sluts dancing around. Later, your handphone rings and everyone boos you.At last, the show ends but you'll need to beratur through the smelly exit.After 30 mintues, you notice that your handphone is lost. The only thing good about cinemas is the fact that you can throw kua-chi on the floor.

4. Customer

Friendly sellers buying VCDs from the stall is like dining in a luxury restaurant. First, those blond hair sellers will greet you with 'leng-Chai'. It's now time to order the meal. If you know what to order, they will search the title for you.But if you're undecided, these fellas will suggest some meals for you. Strangely, all movies (according to them) are nice to watch. When you've finished, here comes the main course. The rectangular box containing all the finest artistic international stuff.(porn?)..And you can bargain too! But when you buy VCDs from Speedy Video, the shop assistants will stand few meters away from you, with their arms tied and eyes alert, thinking that you're another shoplifter.

5. Beli barang buatan Malaysia. The title says it all. No need to say more.

6. You go to the movies...while watching the most suspense part in a love movie....as the guy and girl are about to kiss...all of a sudden, the screen goes into matrix mode. And then it changes to some dull scene. Doesn't this sound familiar? Say thank you to our censorship board for helping us remove the "naughty" parts. You never get this when you buy pirated CDs.

7. 6 years ago, piracy was a minority because of the original CD pricing and contents. 3 years ago, they increased original CD prices by 70% and say it's because of import duties, tax and other crap. While at the same time, the pirated CD prices drop by 50% - 70%.Customers would prefer to buy from a sale right?

8. Piracy helps students to learn new programs at a reduced price cost.If every student is going to spend RM800 just to buy Adobe Photoshop, then Malaysia would lag behind in the computer graphics industry. So in the long run, Malaysia's economic status becomes better with more knowledgeable citizens.

9. As people are willing to spend money on pirated CDs but not that willing to buy original cds, they are circulating the money and helping to increase the GDP.

10. Pirated VCDs offer the latest movies, even before they are shown in the U.S.! Compare this to original VCDs, where you have to wait for a few months after the movie is first released.

Monday 26 November 2007

... men & women ...

Men :

1. All men are extremely busy. 2. Although they are so busy, they still have time for women. 3. Although they have time for women, they don't really care for them. 4. Although they don't really care for them, they always have one around. 5. Although they always have one around them, they always try their luck with others.

Women :

1. The most important thing for a woman is financial security. 2. Although this is so important, they still go out and buy expensive clothes and stuff. 3. Although they always buy expensive clothes, they never have something to wear. 4. Although they never have something to wear, they always dress beautifully. 5. Although they always dress beautifully, their clothes are always just "an old rag". 6. Although their clothes are always "just an old rag", they still expect you! to compliment them. 7. Although they expect you to compliment them, when you do, they don't believe you.

Wisdom:

WHEN I WAS MARRIED 25 YEARS, I TOOK A LOOK AT MY WIFE ONE DAY AND SAID, "HONEY, 25 YEARS AGO WE HAD A CHEAP APARTMENT, A CHEAP CAR, SLEPT ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHED A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV, BUT I GOT TO SLEEP EVERY NIGHT WITH A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD BLOND."

NOW WE HAVE A $2M HOME, A $245,000.00 CAR, NICE BIG BED AND 50" PLASMA SCREEN TV, BUT I'M SLEEPING WITH A 50-YEAR-OLD WOMAN. IT SEEMS TO ME THAT YOU ARE NOT HOLDING UP YOUR SIDE OF THINGS."

MY WIFE IS A VERY REASONABLE WOMAN. SHE TOLD ME TO GO OUT & FIND A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD BLONDE, AND SHE WOULD MAKE SURE THAT I WOULD ONCE AGAIN BE LIVING IN A CHEAP APARTMENT, DRIVING A CHEAP CAR, SLEEPING ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHING A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV.

Monday 12 November 2007

... 4 things you never knew your cellphone could do ...

There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies.

Your mobile phone can actually be a life saver or an emergency tool for survival. Check out the things that you can do with it:

*1*

* The Emergency Number worldwide for **Mobile** is 112 ..*

If you find yourself out of coverage area of your mobile network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked. **Try it out.**

*2*

* Have you locked your keys in the car? Does you car have remote keys?*

This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their cell phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the person at your home press the unlock button, holding it near the mobile phone on their end. Your car will unlock. Saves someone from having to drive your keys to you. Distance is no object. You could be hundreds of miles away, and if you can reach someone who has the other 'remote' for your car, you can unlock the doors (or the trunk). Editor's Note: *It works fine! We tried it out and it unlocked our car over a cell phone!'*

*3*

*Hidden Battery power (some of you might know this arleady)

Imagine your cell battery is very low , you are expecting an important call and you don't have a charger.

Nokia instrument comes with a reserve battery.

To activate, press the keys *3370# Your cell will restart with this reserve and the instrument will show a 50% increase in battery. This reserve will get charged when you charge your cell next time.

AND

*4* How to disable a STOLEN mobile phone?

To check your Mobile phone's serial number, key in the following digits on your phone: * # 0 6 #

A 15 digit code will appear on the screen. This number is unique to your handset. Write it down and keep it somewhere safe. when your phone get stolen, you can phone your service provider and give them this code. They will then be able to block your handset so even if the thief changes the SIM card, your phone will be totally useless.

You probably won't get your phone back, but at least you know that whoever stole it can't use/sell it either. If everybody does this, there would be no point in people stealing mobile phones.


ShoutMix chat widget